I'm going back under......

 (this is also found in my family blog too)

for another Surgery in May. Yep, i'm getting a Pacemaker.Awesome; I know.

I'm not really too stressed out or anything about it. I knew that it was inevitable and bound to happen. Skylair and Isabella just through a bit of a wrench into the plan and it came sooner than we had originally thought it would. But i am okay with that.

I know that there are people like my Mom and Sister that are all worried and stressed about it. With the constant phone calls and check ins and whatnot. But i'm perfectly okay with it. I know the risks and advantages to the procedure and am complacent with what is going to happen.

This was found out and determined through my cardiac catherter that i had last Monday March 22nd. They went in and realized that there was no need for a stent placement in my Aorta, and that oddly enough my aorta actually makes a weird 'S' bend right underneath my Coacrtation. How cool is that? Very Cool. (okay i know i'm a nerd, but if i can't at least joke about my health, then i'll probably be all depressive about it). However while they were doing that procedure they went on ahead and took all the necessary pictures and stats for my doctor so she could decide if i truly needed the pacemaker or not. And Evidently i do.

I was told a month or two back that it was going to most likely be a Bi-Ventricular Pacemaker and that i would need to have two incisions done to complete the procedure. They would have a leave on each of my Ventricles and because of my stature i would have one incision on my upper right chest (my left) where the pacemaker core will rest and the first lead will be hooked up, and i will have a second incision on my side going on the other side of the heart. Due to my small frame two incisions are needed instead of one. I am thinking that i might end up being hospitalized longer than the regular patient because of the dual incisions, but who's really to say until then.

We're trying to figure out what it is that we're going to do regarding this whole surgery. Donald said he would take time off, but we can't really afford it, and then i also learned that they have cut back on the time they allow for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) and also how much they will pay for it as well. I know for a fact we can't afford Donald to take time off of work, even if we get granted FMLA, well that is unless some of our family members are willing to help us out with all of our bills for the month of May. Which i doubt. Not necessarily because they are unwilling, but mainly because i doubt they have the excess funds to do so. Or at least that's what i hope to believe.

Family members have already offered to help us out during this time, which i am thankful for. I trust my doctor and her staff faithfully. I know that they will do anything and everything in their power to let me have a speedy and safe recovery from this.

Hopefully this will make me feel loads better than what i have been feeling, especially this past year. Also, i'm hoping this will finally prove to SSI that i am in dire need of being accepted. I still haven't even heard back from them, i wonder what is taking so long.......

I'm going to hope that we can find a way to get Skylair to stay the night at Donalds Folks during this time. I really don't know how i am going to be able to handle him and Isabella after the surgery, with or without help. I think i may be too much stress. Stress is something you want to try to eliminate before coming home from a surgery like this.  As for Isabella i have a feeling that this is going to be the last month that i will be able to continue nursing her. I'm very paranoid about continued nursing once i'm home from the hospital because of where the surgical incisions will be. I'm very scared that if i do nurse her that she will attempt to touch them, or even worse pull at them out of curiosity......I don't want to wean her, but i think i may be time just because of my deteriorating health. :(..........

So that's the news on me about dying and whatnot......(okay not dying exactly.....more like saving a dying organ.....but still whatever)......Any questions?....perhaps i should look some stuff up and through in some diagrams?.....let me know, i'll comment them if wanted.