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Friday, April 30, 2010
Is it Nap Time Yet?
That has been my question of the day, daily for the past couple of weeks. Since my last doctors appointment, my minor Bronchitis and CHF has been plaguing me. I am always soo soo tired!! It's ridiculous! I nap whenever Isabella naps, in fact both of the kids are napping at this very moment but i decided to try and write up a short blog in silence. It seems like i can't do ANYTHING without feeling completely exhausted. And by Anything, i mean ANYTHING. I can't even do the dishes and take Sky to school without feeling like i need a nap. In fact i find myself taking a nap at least once daily. Today i only got like an hr tops, and then Isabella woke up. That really sucked. Usually she'll take like a 2 hr nap in the afternoons if she didn't take one in the morning. I'm betting it was the obnoxiously loud jackass neighbors that woke us up. Go figure huh?? To top it off, i'm having all these on again off again chest and upper abdomen pains. I really don't feel like going into the ER or anything over it, since it's not stopping me from my daily business per se. But still. It is affecting me. I go in and see the Cardiologist this coming Thursday for my Bi-Ventricular Pacemaker. I'm going to bring up to her all of the aches and pains and also the constant feeling of being Lethargic and Sore. It really sucks. I know that if i do feel really bad i could always go to the ER, hand them my Card and i would be admitted immediately because my records show CHF in the header. But i don't want to have to deal with that if it's not 100% necessary. I feel like garbage always. And this Bronchitis isn't helping in the slightest. My chest is sore from all of the coughing, i keep getting head aches and migraines from constantly coughing. The only up side to the bronchitis is that it has helped me tone my abdominal muscles. LOL. I know, very sad of me to even notice that, right? Because of my listelessness and everything i have checked my weight just out of curiosity, it's at 46 kg, or 101 lbs.....a bit lower than at my previous Cardiac appointment. I wonder what she is going to say about that? Also, i have been looking up information on Marfans Syndrome, and received a packet about it in the mail today. I was contemplating bringing it up to my Cardiologist and get some insight about it from her. I trust her whole heartingly. She has been my cardiologist since i was about 15 after all. I am really hoping that once this surgery happens i will start to feel loads better, and i hope that my SSI gets taken care of after this next surgery, I can't believe they've been stringing me on since last August. That's the Government for you i suppose......I had read about Marfans and it mentioned that nervous system issues branches from the syndrome, if that is true it might explain my Neuralgia....i have an appointment to see a neurologist a couple weeks after my pacemaker surgery, i'm going to talk to the doctor about the pervious medication i have been on for the neuralgia and see if there is more of a holistic approach we can take. Because the last medication i was on was really strong. Don't get me wrong, it did it's job and worked like a charm, But once i took it i was out for the night, unable to function if Skylair woke up at 2am, and i really don't want that for Isabella. Not to mention the fact that i am still nursing her, and Amitryptaline is a class IV drug i believe, and definitely not compatible with breast feeding. That is, it was the last time that i checked. Who knows, it may have changed since then but i highly doubt it. I am on some new medication for my heart right now, and it has alieviated some of the chest pressure i was getting from accumulating water in my pleural cavity versus my appendeges. That's my body i guess, just weird like that. I'll post an update about the impending surgery after my pre-op appointment and everything next Thursday. It's gonna be an interesting appointent, my Mom and Step dad are going to attend as well. I asked my Dad if he wanted to come also, but he felt that it wasn't necessary unless i truly wanted him there. I'm not scared, so i see no point in everybody coming to one pre-operative appointment. Is that stupid of me?
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Arizona.Ugh.
So i've been watching the news this weekend, like always; and i am just appalled at the New Immigration Law that has just passed in Arizona this past week. Before all you people jump on my back, i know that America; Arizona in particular has a very VERY big immigration problem, however i do not agree with this Immigration Bill Whatsoever!! It gives the police the legal right to basically stop ANY Hispanic looking person in Arizona and demand proof of citizenship!! Seriously?! What the Fuck!? For those of you that do not know, a Social Security Card does not count as proof of Citizenship. SO basically they are racially profiling because of the 'Immigration Problem'. Two wrongs do not make a right! What the hell is Hispanic (and i say Hispanic, not Mexican because they are basically targeting brown skinned looking people that COULD BE from Central or Southern America.. I am a Hispanic American, and this severely offends me to no end. What, am i supposed to carry around my fucking Birth Certificate now in the state of Arizona, just so i have the Legal Documentation to Prove i am not here illegally?! That is ridiculous. Perhaps, since we already waste so much fucking money on border patrol; the boarder patrol should do their fucking job properly and legally and turn in the folks crossing over the Rio Grande!!! I was wanting to plan a trip to Arizona sometime in the next couple years to meet with my old Physicians and Surgeons, but as of right now i just want to avoid this racist state all together. How dare that Stupid Governor think that her piece of legislature is LEGAL and covered by the CONSTITUTION. FYI Janet Napolitano, it's not.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
In the beginning.....
I was born Thursday October 17th 1985 at 2357. I was pronounced a healthy baby girl by all medical staff at Good Sammaritan Hospital right outside of Pheonix, Arizona. How very wrong they were.....
I was sent home a couple days after birth with my Mom, Dad and Big Bro. Everything seemed copacetic. That was until i was 23 days old. I was rushed to the hospital, heavily cyanotic. My Pulse and Blood Pressure was practically none existent. You could see my chest heaving up and down struggling to get air into my lungs. Now, does that sound like a perfectly healthy baby girl? I didn't think so.
The doctors ended up placing a chest tube to regulate my breathing and to drain the fluid build up from my lungs. After that they needed to crack open my rib cage to really see what kind of distress my lil heart was truly in. They noticed that the small hole in the center of my heart that all babies are born with never closed. Not at all. They frantically had to find a way to redirect my blood flow, and seal up the gaping hole in my septum. I was diagnosed with a Ventricular Septal Defect. So instead of my heart having 4 different chambers to pump blood through, it only had 3.
On top of that i had cardiomegaly which is the abnormal enlargement of the heart. Mine happened to be where my left ventrical is. So they finished repairing the septal wall which would now be dividing my ventricle in to its regular left and right sides. As they completed that portion on the surgery they realized that my Aorta didn't look quite right as well. But that was just another surgery, because they couldn't keep the heart muscle flat lined for too long, fearing mental retardnation or death.
I was in and out of Phoenix Children's Hospital many times during the first two years of life....
The doctors ended up placing a chest tube to regulate my breathing and to drain the fluid build up from my lungs. After that they needed to crack open my rib cage to really see what kind of distress my lil heart was truly in. They noticed that the small hole in the center of my heart that all babies are born with never closed. Not at all. They frantically had to find a way to redirect my blood flow, and seal up the gaping hole in my septum. I was diagnosed with a Ventricular Septal Defect. So instead of my heart having 4 different chambers to pump blood through, it only had 3.
On top of that i had cardiomegaly which is the abnormal enlargement of the heart. Mine happened to be where my left ventrical is. So they finished repairing the septal wall which would now be dividing my ventricle in to its regular left and right sides. As they completed that portion on the surgery they realized that my Aorta didn't look quite right as well. But that was just another surgery, because they couldn't keep the heart muscle flat lined for too long, fearing mental retardnation or death.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Green Curry with Protein of Choice and Carb Of Choice
is oh to yummy!! But it is a tad on the spicy side. Now keep in mind this is a Thai style Curry. Not Japanese; Chinese or Indian. They all have their own unique flavor, and i personally after trying all 4 prefer Thai Curry Over All.
There are several ways you can make Thai Green Curry ( or any type, really). You can either go online to a Thai Foods Website and they can give you the step by step directions for making it at home, by scratch. My self on the other hand doesn't have that much time to put dinner together so i just go to the Asian Market Place ( Anyone really) and buy a specific brand "Mae Ploy". (FYI the "Mae Ploy" brand as a lot of other curry paste brands do contain fish sauce, so if you are vegan or strictly vegetarian you will want to read the ingredients or just cook from scratch.The reason i use this brand is because i know it is a brand that is used in a lot of the Thai Restraunts around my home, and i like their curries.LOL. Anywho, if you're only cooking for 2, because my kids wont eat Curry due to the spice level; you really don't need too much of the paste.
What you need:
Curry Paste
Coconut Milk
Veggies
Protein
Rice OR Noodles
The recipe calls for this:
Vegetables:
Pick Vegetables of your choosing- i honestly prefer white onions and bell peppers (red or green)
You will need one whole Bell Pepper; you would want to cut it how you like. Personally i cut them into thin strips, maybe about 1/4-1/2 in think.
One half Onion- I cut my onion in half first, then slice it, then cut the slices in half so that they're not uber big pieces of onion to bite into.
(i've eaten this curry with with carrots, zuccini and mushrooms tossed in as well. add what you like!)
Protein:
After cutting up the desired Vegetables you will want to chose a protein.
I've honestly thought that White Meat (i.e. Chicken or Pork) or Tofu goes best with the flavor of Green Curry or Seafood. For some reason Beef just seems too thick and doesn't soak up a lot of the curry flavor.
It is best to make the pieces of protein bite size. Now what may be bite size to one, may not be to another; therefore i've decided not to tell you how to cut up the protein. With the exception of Seafood, just leave it as is; unless it's fish then cut to your desire.
There are two ways to cook the protein. You can either boil a pan of water and steam the protein first, or you can just cook it in the pan with the curry it's self. Restraunts cook the protein first in water and then add it to the pan of curry with choice of veggies :D. That's the way i like to do it, but it does mean you'll have an extra pan to clean after wards. Just keep that in mind.
The Curry:
Toss 50g of curry paste with 200g of Coconut Milk. Then add another Cup of Coconut Milk to the mix and bring to a boil. You will then want to add your protein of choice to the pan now, let the sauce soak into your protein for a bit (it depends on if you're placing raw or already steamed protein into the pan at this point). You will then want to add your Vegetables, just too them into the pan and stir everything up. Put the heat on Medium at this point and just let the curry simmer. After a couple minutes, taste. If it is too spicy; add a little bit more Coconut Milk, if it is not spicy enough you can either add more Curry Paste or you can add Chili Flakes. I prefer to add Chili Flakes to my recipe if it is not at the desired spice level. And that's It!
Rice:
This portion works best if you have a rice steamer, like i do. Just start the rice right before you start the curry process and it should be done by the time you're finished with the main dish! Place on side of dish, and add curry!
Noodles:
Take desired noodles, i have found that Vermicilli Rice noodles Work best, and just boil them how you would if you were to make Spaghetti. When noodles are done, place them in a Medium to Large size bowl, so that there is no mess, and just pour the curry over it!
FYI!!!
May i remind you, this is a somewhat spicy dish....so if you can't stand spicy things like Pepperoni or BBQ sauce you would not want to try this. Curry is made using Chili's so there is no real way to make it Mild.
Let me know how it turns out, or what you guys think. This is one of my favorite meals, and has been since i met my Husband 6 1/2 years ago.
Leave me a comment or msg me on fb (whichever) if you have an idea on a recipe or anything like that.
Thai Style Green Curry with *Shrimp* and White Steamed Rice
There are several ways you can make Thai Green Curry ( or any type, really). You can either go online to a Thai Foods Website and they can give you the step by step directions for making it at home, by scratch. My self on the other hand doesn't have that much time to put dinner together so i just go to the Asian Market Place ( Anyone really) and buy a specific brand "Mae Ploy". (FYI the "Mae Ploy" brand as a lot of other curry paste brands do contain fish sauce, so if you are vegan or strictly vegetarian you will want to read the ingredients or just cook from scratch.The reason i use this brand is because i know it is a brand that is used in a lot of the Thai Restraunts around my home, and i like their curries.LOL. Anywho, if you're only cooking for 2, because my kids wont eat Curry due to the spice level; you really don't need too much of the paste.
What you need:
Curry Paste
Coconut Milk
Veggies
Protein
Rice OR Noodles
The recipe calls for this:
Vegetables:
Pick Vegetables of your choosing- i honestly prefer white onions and bell peppers (red or green)
You will need one whole Bell Pepper; you would want to cut it how you like. Personally i cut them into thin strips, maybe about 1/4-1/2 in think.
One half Onion- I cut my onion in half first, then slice it, then cut the slices in half so that they're not uber big pieces of onion to bite into.
(i've eaten this curry with with carrots, zuccini and mushrooms tossed in as well. add what you like!)
Protein:
After cutting up the desired Vegetables you will want to chose a protein.
I've honestly thought that White Meat (i.e. Chicken or Pork) or Tofu goes best with the flavor of Green Curry or Seafood. For some reason Beef just seems too thick and doesn't soak up a lot of the curry flavor.
It is best to make the pieces of protein bite size. Now what may be bite size to one, may not be to another; therefore i've decided not to tell you how to cut up the protein. With the exception of Seafood, just leave it as is; unless it's fish then cut to your desire.
There are two ways to cook the protein. You can either boil a pan of water and steam the protein first, or you can just cook it in the pan with the curry it's self. Restraunts cook the protein first in water and then add it to the pan of curry with choice of veggies :D. That's the way i like to do it, but it does mean you'll have an extra pan to clean after wards. Just keep that in mind.
The Curry:
Toss 50g of curry paste with 200g of Coconut Milk. Then add another Cup of Coconut Milk to the mix and bring to a boil. You will then want to add your protein of choice to the pan now, let the sauce soak into your protein for a bit (it depends on if you're placing raw or already steamed protein into the pan at this point). You will then want to add your Vegetables, just too them into the pan and stir everything up. Put the heat on Medium at this point and just let the curry simmer. After a couple minutes, taste. If it is too spicy; add a little bit more Coconut Milk, if it is not spicy enough you can either add more Curry Paste or you can add Chili Flakes. I prefer to add Chili Flakes to my recipe if it is not at the desired spice level. And that's It!
Rice:
This portion works best if you have a rice steamer, like i do. Just start the rice right before you start the curry process and it should be done by the time you're finished with the main dish! Place on side of dish, and add curry!
Noodles:
Take desired noodles, i have found that Vermicilli Rice noodles Work best, and just boil them how you would if you were to make Spaghetti. When noodles are done, place them in a Medium to Large size bowl, so that there is no mess, and just pour the curry over it!
FYI!!!
May i remind you, this is a somewhat spicy dish....so if you can't stand spicy things like Pepperoni or BBQ sauce you would not want to try this. Curry is made using Chili's so there is no real way to make it Mild.
Let me know how it turns out, or what you guys think. This is one of my favorite meals, and has been since i met my Husband 6 1/2 years ago.
Leave me a comment or msg me on fb (whichever) if you have an idea on a recipe or anything like that.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Growing up with CHD/CHF......Part 1.
is hard.
When i was a baby i was always in and out of the hospital with surgeries or just because i was sick. Growing up my parents tried to have me lead as 'normal' a childhood as possible. Although, i do know that 'normal' is a relative word, because what may be 'normal' to one may be 'abnormal' to another. I played sports, was in music, went to public school and had friends. But during all of this there were random stints of time where i wouldn't be able to show up to school; anywhere from a week, to several months. In 2nd grade i missed the whole month of February because i caught Triple Pneumonia. Yes. Triple. That was no fun at all, but i did learn that the PICU has a really great Play room for Patients.Growing up a lot of my friends didn't really know why i would randomly miss school. That was until i got to Junior High and P.E. became an everyday thing....
When in 7th grade i had to start 'actively' partaking in P.E. I was given a really good teacher that knew i could only do what my body would allow, so if i didn't run the mile; i didn't run the stupid mile. In August of 1998, right before i started 8th grade; i became severely ill. My folks didn't really know what was wrong with me, after a day or two of crazy fever and everything they took me into the docs for an appointment. I remember this day vividly. We went into the doctors office, i was fairly lethargic....i looked pale....and just really felt like shit. The doctor weighed me and i clocked in at about 80 lbs....that's right, 80 lbs at 13. I was previously about 100. This was just the general clinic so they didn't have an Echocardiogram Machine or anything. But they did have an EKG, he took my EKG and did a few more exams on me. When he completed he looked up at us while grabbing for his phone and told my mom to take me to the ER and that he was calling a head to let them know.....
We got to the hospital and a billion other tests were performed on me. A CT. MRI. MRA. Echo. EKG. STATS. Everything. I was hospitalized for 2 weeks. In the end they diagnosed me with Endocarditis. Inflammation of the Muscle lining on the Heart. And what do i owe the great pleasure of this diagnosis? None other than the Dentist. Yep. That's right. The Dentist. I was already Petrified of this Jackass; but now i have even more reason to run and hide from any mention of the 'D-Word'.....
2 weeks after i was initially admitted to the hospital i was discharged to go home. But it was not that simple. I was going to be on an out patient care program. They sent me home with a Home IV....usually they try to do a home IV the same as an IV at a hospital, through the forearm. This is when we first realized i might have a neurological problem, called Neuraliga; as well. ( Yay me right?) Because when they placed the pick-line in my forearm my whole nervous system went psychotic and basically spit the IV line out of my arm, onto the floor. So in the end i had to go under and have an IV surgically placed into my heart.
It was kind of like a port. I had to wear a fanny pack type contraption to hold the IV medication bags, which was Amoxicillin and Potassium; otherwise known as Banana Bags. On top of the IV medication bags that i had to carry around with me, i also had these medicine balls that i had to hook up to my IV port a couple of times a day with Gentamiacin. Let me tell you; that has to be the worst medication i have ever received. Both Intravenously and Intramuscularly. This medicine had to be kept in the freezer to preserve the antibiotics and protiens. And it BURNS like all HELL when administered. A nurse came to my home a couple of times a week to check on me and help change the dressings on my IV port site. A teacher from my school also came a couple of times a week to teach me my lessons as well as give/ collect homework. It had to be the most boring couple of months in my life. On top of having that IV bag and Fridge and Freezer full of medications i had to carry around needleless syringes pre-stocked with Saline to flush the IV as need in case of back flow.
Yes, back flow. Because if i got to active blood with shoot out of my heart muscle and fill up my IV line. Let me tell you, the first time i had to flush my line i was petrified. My hands were shaking so much that to this day i don't even know how i was able to fit it into the IV port to clear the line. To this day ANY type of syringe makes me cringe. Just hearing the medication Gentamiacin being said makes my spine tingle....it is that bad. I was so sheltered and lonely during this time. I had family of course, but not many friends.
This my mom saw, so 2 months after my diagnosis was my birthday and my mom thought it'd be god for me to throw a surprise birthday party. I was very shocked when i came home from spending the day with my dad to see all of my friends at the house to party. My mom even let the party last hours longer that she usually would have. But part of me was un easy about it. I wasn't sure what to do during the party, for fear of the IV....to be honest at the time it kind of sucked. But i know why she did it.....she wanted to see me happy again.
A week or so after the party i was able to go back into the hospital to have the IV port surgically removed. Which left me with 3 circular scars on the right side of my chest....weird; i know! I was able to go back to school once Halloween passed....little did we know that would be the last of our cardiac issues.......
When i was a baby i was always in and out of the hospital with surgeries or just because i was sick. Growing up my parents tried to have me lead as 'normal' a childhood as possible. Although, i do know that 'normal' is a relative word, because what may be 'normal' to one may be 'abnormal' to another. I played sports, was in music, went to public school and had friends. But during all of this there were random stints of time where i wouldn't be able to show up to school; anywhere from a week, to several months. In 2nd grade i missed the whole month of February because i caught Triple Pneumonia. Yes. Triple. That was no fun at all, but i did learn that the PICU has a really great Play room for Patients.Growing up a lot of my friends didn't really know why i would randomly miss school. That was until i got to Junior High and P.E. became an everyday thing....
a photo of a heart during open heart surgery.
When in 7th grade i had to start 'actively' partaking in P.E. I was given a really good teacher that knew i could only do what my body would allow, so if i didn't run the mile; i didn't run the stupid mile. In August of 1998, right before i started 8th grade; i became severely ill. My folks didn't really know what was wrong with me, after a day or two of crazy fever and everything they took me into the docs for an appointment. I remember this day vividly. We went into the doctors office, i was fairly lethargic....i looked pale....and just really felt like shit. The doctor weighed me and i clocked in at about 80 lbs....that's right, 80 lbs at 13. I was previously about 100. This was just the general clinic so they didn't have an Echocardiogram Machine or anything. But they did have an EKG, he took my EKG and did a few more exams on me. When he completed he looked up at us while grabbing for his phone and told my mom to take me to the ER and that he was calling a head to let them know.....
We got to the hospital and a billion other tests were performed on me. A CT. MRI. MRA. Echo. EKG. STATS. Everything. I was hospitalized for 2 weeks. In the end they diagnosed me with Endocarditis. Inflammation of the Muscle lining on the Heart. And what do i owe the great pleasure of this diagnosis? None other than the Dentist. Yep. That's right. The Dentist. I was already Petrified of this Jackass; but now i have even more reason to run and hide from any mention of the 'D-Word'.....
2 weeks after i was initially admitted to the hospital i was discharged to go home. But it was not that simple. I was going to be on an out patient care program. They sent me home with a Home IV....usually they try to do a home IV the same as an IV at a hospital, through the forearm. This is when we first realized i might have a neurological problem, called Neuraliga; as well. ( Yay me right?) Because when they placed the pick-line in my forearm my whole nervous system went psychotic and basically spit the IV line out of my arm, onto the floor. So in the end i had to go under and have an IV surgically placed into my heart.
It was kind of like a port. I had to wear a fanny pack type contraption to hold the IV medication bags, which was Amoxicillin and Potassium; otherwise known as Banana Bags. On top of the IV medication bags that i had to carry around with me, i also had these medicine balls that i had to hook up to my IV port a couple of times a day with Gentamiacin. Let me tell you; that has to be the worst medication i have ever received. Both Intravenously and Intramuscularly. This medicine had to be kept in the freezer to preserve the antibiotics and protiens. And it BURNS like all HELL when administered. A nurse came to my home a couple of times a week to check on me and help change the dressings on my IV port site. A teacher from my school also came a couple of times a week to teach me my lessons as well as give/ collect homework. It had to be the most boring couple of months in my life. On top of having that IV bag and Fridge and Freezer full of medications i had to carry around needleless syringes pre-stocked with Saline to flush the IV as need in case of back flow.
Yes, back flow. Because if i got to active blood with shoot out of my heart muscle and fill up my IV line. Let me tell you, the first time i had to flush my line i was petrified. My hands were shaking so much that to this day i don't even know how i was able to fit it into the IV port to clear the line. To this day ANY type of syringe makes me cringe. Just hearing the medication Gentamiacin being said makes my spine tingle....it is that bad. I was so sheltered and lonely during this time. I had family of course, but not many friends.
This my mom saw, so 2 months after my diagnosis was my birthday and my mom thought it'd be god for me to throw a surprise birthday party. I was very shocked when i came home from spending the day with my dad to see all of my friends at the house to party. My mom even let the party last hours longer that she usually would have. But part of me was un easy about it. I wasn't sure what to do during the party, for fear of the IV....to be honest at the time it kind of sucked. But i know why she did it.....she wanted to see me happy again.
A week or so after the party i was able to go back into the hospital to have the IV port surgically removed. Which left me with 3 circular scars on the right side of my chest....weird; i know! I was able to go back to school once Halloween passed....little did we know that would be the last of our cardiac issues.......
Sunday, April 11, 2010
We're Moving!!!!
To CHINA!!!!
Donalds' Parents' are planning to move back after retirement. They decided they don't want to retire here in America completely away from 99% if their family. We were talking about it and decided that we want to move there as well. As a family we don't really like staying here in America, i'm sick of all this political mumbo jumbo and how 'we' , that is Americans think that we are better than the rest of the world. When, in fact we are not. Nobody, nor Any Country is the best. I think it just has to correlate with your own belief system and family system.
I know this might come as a shock to a lot of you, but to us it just makes sense. Yes, i will be leaving all of My Friends and Family behind, but it seems like i correspond with everybody via Internet and Phone anyways, and they have Phones and Internet in China/Hong Kong. Hell most of our Electronics came from there anyways. Not like that really matters or anything.
We just think that it is time for a change. Yes i would have to learn a new language, but i've been in the process of learning Cantonese the past few years anyways though. Plus once you are living in the society and actually wanting to learn the language it will grow on you and become second nature. Yes it would far away from My friend and family and close to about 99% of Donalds family, but why should my family be the only ones around? Not like they really are for the most part anyways.....
I am relishing in the idea of living in Asia!!! I can hardly wait! I've been wanting to go back there for years to meet Donalds family, but just to visit in general; i've always wanted to go! It would be great for the kids to actually get to know Donalds side of the family IRL versus just talking to them on the phone every now and then. We could always save up money to come and visit Friends and Family here in America, it would most likely be a every couple of years type thing, but it's not like we have picked up and moved to Pluto!
I know this may sound a bit absurd and insane to you....but to us it actually feels, well....it feels right.
Oh yeah, it's not like we're leaving this summer or anything like that. It will most likely take us a couple of years to save up enough money to pick up and move everything to China or Hong Kong (whichever we move to); to find a home; work and school. I am Eager to Seize the Day (Carpe Diem) and just go with the flow and try new things! I feel this is going to be the right move for our little family.....it's just a matter of when it will take place. Perhaps not next year....perhaps not in 5. But it is a plan none the less.
So.....Goodbye America, Hello Asia.....well, maybe not for a few more years; but it's something we will be saying in the future!
We just think that it is time for a change. Yes i would have to learn a new language, but i've been in the process of learning Cantonese the past few years anyways though. Plus once you are living in the society and actually wanting to learn the language it will grow on you and become second nature. Yes it would far away from My friend and family and close to about 99% of Donalds family, but why should my family be the only ones around? Not like they really are for the most part anyways.....
I am relishing in the idea of living in Asia!!! I can hardly wait! I've been wanting to go back there for years to meet Donalds family, but just to visit in general; i've always wanted to go! It would be great for the kids to actually get to know Donalds side of the family IRL versus just talking to them on the phone every now and then. We could always save up money to come and visit Friends and Family here in America, it would most likely be a every couple of years type thing, but it's not like we have picked up and moved to Pluto!
I know this may sound a bit absurd and insane to you....but to us it actually feels, well....it feels right.
Oh yeah, it's not like we're leaving this summer or anything like that. It will most likely take us a couple of years to save up enough money to pick up and move everything to China or Hong Kong (whichever we move to); to find a home; work and school. I am Eager to Seize the Day (Carpe Diem) and just go with the flow and try new things! I feel this is going to be the right move for our little family.....it's just a matter of when it will take place. Perhaps not next year....perhaps not in 5. But it is a plan none the less.
So.....Goodbye America, Hello Asia.....well, maybe not for a few more years; but it's something we will be saying in the future!
Yummy Yum Yum :P!
So i got this idea to do maybe a weekend 'Fun Topic' Blog from Jessica @ Everyday Rebel. I think on the weekends i'll do a foodie blog! It's gonna be a bit different i bet from some of the other foodie blogs that surface throughout social networking sites and other blogging sites, considering the fact that i am just a stay at home mom; whom coincidentally doesn't have to always cook :D! Yay me i guess for being married to a Chef, hahaha! However i do enjoy food greatly, of course; and on the rare occasion that i do embark in to the abyss which is our kitchen (it is HUGE compared to our old kitchen at our last house.lol) i try to cook something different that i enjoy, and that the kids will eat. Sometimes we have to make double meals; a meal for us and a meal for the kids, because we love spicy foods and the little guy can't stomach it....although the little lady seems to love spicy food! Funny, isn't it?.....Perhaps i could use some guidance on what i could make my first real 'Yummy' post about.....Maybe call it 'Weekly Dish'?....im not too sure yet......Help me out with a name if you want! I plan on making it a Saturday or Friday night post, and that will be on top of whatever else i post during the week. Next week i think i'll start off on Asian Cuisine....perfect huh?!....I'll touch up on the differences on how the Hubby and I cook different types of Asian cuisine, WITH recipes....and if i can figure it out a price breakdown on how much it would cost an average family of say....4?...to cook up the meal. Any suggestions on dishes are welcome....hoping that either of us have the experience with it, which i'm sure between myself and the chef we should come fairly close :).
So keep your eyes open for a Foodie Blog next weekend with 2 different types of Asian Cuisine!
Friday, April 9, 2010
::tear::
(also on my family blog)
...........that is how i feel. I am so stressed and overwhelmed with the kids. Other than from Donald,of course; i don't really get any real break. I can't stand it. I don't feel good, and i think all of this stress with the kids and no real break from them, is making me feel even worse. All i fucking hear all day is the kids. Do i get a break? No, Not really. Do Donald and i ever get to spend any time together? No. Not Really. Do i get to hang out with friends? No.Not at All. In fact i haven't even seen a friend, or had the chance to in months. The last date Night we had was a couple months ago when Iron Stakes first opened and all that was; was a 90 minute quick dinner 2 minutes from our house. We need more Date Nights and non-kid time to keep our sanity; or at least mine .And to top it off, if a friend ever does want to hang out i usually can't go because i have nobody to watch the kids for me so i can get a few hours away. Just.Fucking.Great.
Lately i have been craving for a break, it seems like each day i am feeling worse and worse. Not to mention how my energy has been decreasing....daily almost. It's pretty pathetic i might add. I'm not even 25 and sometimes i have the energy range of a 60 year old. One Word. Pathetic. I have been having a lot of SOB as well, up top of my old medication ( Lisinopril and Carvedelol/Coreg) and the inhaler i was given a couple months ago i am now on Lasix; i diuretic (water pill). Yay me?......Don't count on it. Hopefully this Pacemaker i'm getting soon will help me feel better, because lately i get so overwhelmed and just wanna cry.
I hate feeling like garbage and not getting a break. To top it off Sky has had this little attitude problem, which is really starting to annoy. I can't seem to get him to stop being so cocky for one. For two, he is still refusing to stay over at Mah-Mahs and that's not helping me out either. Isabella seems like she is starting her attitude early also. When she doesn't get her way she's throwing temper tantrums and everything, and is wanting to be held a lot more lately. It's weird though, bc when i want to or need to hold her she gets mad but when i'm doing something all she can do is say " Mommy, Po-Po! "......Gah!.......
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being a SAHM. I get to be here to witness all of the milestones and teach and play with them everyday. But it's a 24-7 job, and it would be nice for some sort of a break......I hate feeling like shit. I hate always being tense. I hate never having down time......Oh, and don't even tell me that's what happens when you're a mom. I really don't want to hear that patronizing rubbish. I know moms that are able to get out and have a break and not feel like they're on the brink of depression......I only Wish i could be one of those moms again.....
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Differences.
There are so many that we come across daily. But what do you do when you're stuck dealing with it and can't necessarily walk away?......
Be the better person. Accept people for who they are, and don't try to change them (unless of course something detrimental is going on). I see myself as a very open minded and respectful of other peoples choices, even when i don't agree with it. I may make a comment about why i do what i do, or ask why they do what they do. But it's mainly to educate myself about other peoples ways and beliefs. I don't force my 'beliefs' on you or 'damn' you for not agreeing with me, why can't you do the same?
Nobodies beliefs are necessarily wrong. Just different from your own. I have nothing wrong with Peaceful Debate on touchy subjects, but once those debates turn to belittlement and feelings of entitlement....then we got a problem. Just be smart in your choice of words. Be Civil. Nobody knows what is really going to happen. Ever.
Everybody is Different, if everybody wasn't then we would live in one boring ass world.....probably a world much like the one dreamt up by Adolf Hitler or Napoleon. (I know those guys were to the extreme but get my point?) Of course you can be passionate about whatever it is that you believe in, but you have to be careful on how you passionately get your point of view across. You don't want to come off as a condescending Ass. Well maybe you do. I mean you never really know about people anymore.....
This is America. The Great Melting Pot of the World. So why is it so hard for it's citizens to grasp the concept of differences? This i will never know. For the record:
Be the better person. Accept people for who they are, and don't try to change them (unless of course something detrimental is going on). I see myself as a very open minded and respectful of other peoples choices, even when i don't agree with it. I may make a comment about why i do what i do, or ask why they do what they do. But it's mainly to educate myself about other peoples ways and beliefs. I don't force my 'beliefs' on you or 'damn' you for not agreeing with me, why can't you do the same?
Nobodies beliefs are necessarily wrong. Just different from your own. I have nothing wrong with Peaceful Debate on touchy subjects, but once those debates turn to belittlement and feelings of entitlement....then we got a problem. Just be smart in your choice of words. Be Civil. Nobody knows what is really going to happen. Ever.
Everybody is Different, if everybody wasn't then we would live in one boring ass world.....probably a world much like the one dreamt up by Adolf Hitler or Napoleon. (I know those guys were to the extreme but get my point?) Of course you can be passionate about whatever it is that you believe in, but you have to be careful on how you passionately get your point of view across. You don't want to come off as a condescending Ass. Well maybe you do. I mean you never really know about people anymore.....
This is America. The Great Melting Pot of the World. So why is it so hard for it's citizens to grasp the concept of differences? This i will never know. For the record:
- I am Very Liberal
- I do NOT Believe in God/Jesus ect
- I am an AP
- I do not CIO
- I Speak My Mind
- I do not force my beliefs on others, and expect the same from others
- I am Open Minded
- I research EVERYTHING....Vaccines, parenting, theology.....whatever.
My Lucky 4
4 Shows I watch:
~House
~Bones
~Glee
~Hells Kitchen
4 Things I'm passionate about:
~Family
~Friends
~Activism
~Reading/Learning
4 Phrases I say a lot:
~Wth?!
~For Reals!?
~Seriously?
~Cool Beans!
4 Things I have learned from the past:
~ Never take Anything or Anyone for granted
~Ce La Vie/Carpe Diem
~Anything is Possible
~Believe.In Anything(one) or Everything(one)
4 Place I would like to go:
~China
~Japan
~Australia
~Italy
4 Things I did yesterday:
~Took Sky to school
~Cleaned the Kitchen
~Watched American Idol
~Cooked Dinner
4 Things I'm looking forward to:
~The Kids Growing Up.
~Going back to School
~A Weekend Getaway
~Health.
4 Things I love about winter:
~Sweaters
~The Weather (im weird)
~Ice Skating (even though it's been awhile)
~Drinking Hot CoaCoa (Ash!)
4 Things on my wishlist:
~Settle down, and never move again. :D (Ash!)
~A Degree
~A Real Wedding Day
~Become Debt Free
4 People I tag:
~Amy McAllister
~Whomever
~Else
~Reads This
~House
~Bones
~Glee
~Hells Kitchen
4 Things I'm passionate about:
~Family
~Friends
~Activism
~Reading/Learning
4 Phrases I say a lot:
~Wth?!
~For Reals!?
~Seriously?
~Cool Beans!
4 Things I have learned from the past:
~ Never take Anything or Anyone for granted
~Ce La Vie/Carpe Diem
~Anything is Possible
~Believe.In Anything(one) or Everything(one)
4 Place I would like to go:
~China
~Japan
~Australia
~Italy
4 Things I did yesterday:
~Took Sky to school
~Cleaned the Kitchen
~Watched American Idol
~Cooked Dinner
4 Things I'm looking forward to:
~The Kids Growing Up.
~Going back to School
~A Weekend Getaway
~Health.
4 Things I love about winter:
~Sweaters
~The Weather (im weird)
~Ice Skating (even though it's been awhile)
~Drinking Hot CoaCoa (Ash!)
4 Things on my wishlist:
~Settle down, and never move again. :D (Ash!)
~A Degree
~A Real Wedding Day
~Become Debt Free
4 People I tag:
~Amy McAllister
~Whomever
~Else
~Reads This
No Morals.
I Have NO Morals!? What, Because i chose to give my children the best food available and don't hide in a disgusting bathroom stall or hot car to feed them because YOU feel uncomfortable? That is ridiculous. How about grow the fuck up?! You say i have no class.....i'm not flopping it all of the place for everybody to see like a strip tease at the local titty bar, i'm providing nourishment to MY child. You say it's rude,disrespectful, a private matter, or even disgusting ect. But isn't people wearing clothing that OBVIOUSLY does not fit them fit the same stature? I don't see you going over to them making a big deal about it. How hard is it to turn your head and not pay any attention? I feel disgusted going out and about seeing being trot around when they are a size 26 but think they're a size 2, but i don't have the right to walk up to them and tell them to 'Cover Up'. So why should you have the right to tell me how to feed my child? How about grow up. Quit being such a Prude. I had the statement that Breastfeeding is a sacred, emotional connection between mother and child....much like sex....(really?....common Breastfeeding is now on the same par as sex?) and should be done in private. Yes, Sex should be done in private. However, how in the world can sex and breastfeeding even correlate together?! Can you tell me that? I thought that in America we are a Free society. Obviously we are not because some people can't get it around the mind that this is a natural, beautiful thing.
I love the other argument i get, why don't you nurse that baby at home. You know they're feeding schedule. Yes, we do know our childrens' nursing schedules; however the younger the baby the closer the intervals are. And even with older babies, sometimes they're hungry before schedule. Don't you ever get hungry outside of the general meal times ( 7am, noon and 5pm)? I'm sure you do, or at least have. I guess i can just tell you to wait until the scheduled feeding time and to....um....suck it up i suppose?....Yeah i thought not too. Another comment i often hear is, if you know ahead of time bring a bottle. Or Hell just carry a bottle with you. HELLO! Not all breastfed babies will take a bottle, and there are plenty women out there that cannot pump milk sufficiently enough like myself. Due to prior medical issues i am unable to pump ANY milk, i've tried every type of breast pump there is and to no avail, Nothing. So what does that mean, i have to stay locked in my house or hidden in a bathroom stall because you can't grow up? Please. Why don't you grow up.
I enjoy hearing the 'No Morals' or 'No Class' argument because i don't bring a bottle with me while i'm out and about with my child. Would you say that to your Grandmothers or Great Grandmothers? Because back in their day Breastfeeding was all that they had. Would you walk up to them and question their morals and class all because they were doing something that is supposed to be considered 'Normal'? Yeah, i would love to hear or even see the reaction that statement receives.
I have Morals. I am not 'flashing the world' when i discretely lift my shirt to nurse my child. I am not a flashy person in nature, so why would i want to world to stare at me. Why is it perfectly normal and exceptable in our society to be in public dressed like a fucking slut; or having outragously large amounts of fat protruding over or through our clothing, but it's not okay to nurse? Something is terribly wrong with that. You wouldn't dare walk up to the girl dressed like a skank, or approach the obese person and make a comment, but for some reason you people find it just to approach a nursing mother and call her names and demean her choices (Great Choices i might add) because you can't look away,
I'm sorry, the problem does not lay with the Mother or nursing child, the problem is You. The Problem is Society, and it needs to be corrected. America needs to grow the fuck up and i have a suggestion, i don't know Speak out about things that need to be Spoken out about, like Abuse; neglect; Drugs......not Nursing Families. This is ridiculous. It really makes me weep for the future for this country (amongst other not so hot things going on here).....Do we really have nothing else important but to embarass and harass a Nursing Mother and Child? Do we really need to feel that self gratified? If so, you need to look inside yourself and find out what the real issue is. Because it's certainly not due to something this natural.
I Will Nurse when my child needs it. I Will NOT hide in a Bathroom; or Car; or even my house because you are immature. Oh, i guess i'm just a selfish inconsiderate Bitch. Well if i am to you, then let me be a Proud Selfish Inconsiderate Bitch, 'Shut the Fuck Up, and Grow the Fuck up. Stay the Hell out of my Business and get a damn Life!'...............
I love the other argument i get, why don't you nurse that baby at home. You know they're feeding schedule. Yes, we do know our childrens' nursing schedules; however the younger the baby the closer the intervals are. And even with older babies, sometimes they're hungry before schedule. Don't you ever get hungry outside of the general meal times ( 7am, noon and 5pm)? I'm sure you do, or at least have. I guess i can just tell you to wait until the scheduled feeding time and to....um....suck it up i suppose?....Yeah i thought not too. Another comment i often hear is, if you know ahead of time bring a bottle. Or Hell just carry a bottle with you. HELLO! Not all breastfed babies will take a bottle, and there are plenty women out there that cannot pump milk sufficiently enough like myself. Due to prior medical issues i am unable to pump ANY milk, i've tried every type of breast pump there is and to no avail, Nothing. So what does that mean, i have to stay locked in my house or hidden in a bathroom stall because you can't grow up? Please. Why don't you grow up.
I enjoy hearing the 'No Morals' or 'No Class' argument because i don't bring a bottle with me while i'm out and about with my child. Would you say that to your Grandmothers or Great Grandmothers? Because back in their day Breastfeeding was all that they had. Would you walk up to them and question their morals and class all because they were doing something that is supposed to be considered 'Normal'? Yeah, i would love to hear or even see the reaction that statement receives.
I have Morals. I am not 'flashing the world' when i discretely lift my shirt to nurse my child. I am not a flashy person in nature, so why would i want to world to stare at me. Why is it perfectly normal and exceptable in our society to be in public dressed like a fucking slut; or having outragously large amounts of fat protruding over or through our clothing, but it's not okay to nurse? Something is terribly wrong with that. You wouldn't dare walk up to the girl dressed like a skank, or approach the obese person and make a comment, but for some reason you people find it just to approach a nursing mother and call her names and demean her choices (Great Choices i might add) because you can't look away,
I'm sorry, the problem does not lay with the Mother or nursing child, the problem is You. The Problem is Society, and it needs to be corrected. America needs to grow the fuck up and i have a suggestion, i don't know Speak out about things that need to be Spoken out about, like Abuse; neglect; Drugs......not Nursing Families. This is ridiculous. It really makes me weep for the future for this country (amongst other not so hot things going on here).....Do we really have nothing else important but to embarass and harass a Nursing Mother and Child? Do we really need to feel that self gratified? If so, you need to look inside yourself and find out what the real issue is. Because it's certainly not due to something this natural.
I Will Nurse when my child needs it. I Will NOT hide in a Bathroom; or Car; or even my house because you are immature. Oh, i guess i'm just a selfish inconsiderate Bitch. Well if i am to you, then let me be a Proud Selfish Inconsiderate Bitch, 'Shut the Fuck Up, and Grow the Fuck up. Stay the Hell out of my Business and get a damn Life!'...............
