A Ridiculous Double Standard

has been put forth in my family this past year, or so I have noticed; oh, and the Hubby too. When i had our Son back in 2006 and our Daughter last January my family distinctively told us they would not become nannies watching the children just so we can go play. Which is something i whole heartedly agree with. School and Work would be practically the only time they would babysit, because we were/are young parents they didn't want us out 'partying' (even though that wasn't/isn't really us anyways) while they took care of our child. However, my sister had gotten pregnant with her son last year and had him this past October; tell me why my SIL willing goes behind my brothers back to watch the baby? What happened to the rule?! She has no job, she isn't going to school anymore, those were the ground rues for child care. It's a complete double standard and it infuriates me!!! Oh yeah, when i got prego (both times!!) my hubby and i were both working full time, and when i was prego with our son we were both Full Time college students as well. We don't ask for much, just the occasional evening that they could watch the kids for a couple hours. Have they EVER done it? No! Meanwhile little sister gets o do whatever. Why is there such a double standard with this? I am so mad about this, and nobody ever seems to understand why! The excuse i get from my SIL is because my kids cry too much. Well sorry my children let me know when they're uncomfortable. Sorry i Breastfed. Sorry i co-sleep. Oh, wait! You're mad because my children can tell the difference between Mommy and Daddy taking care of them and (to them) some random person. Why should i be penalized because my children aren't treated like a sack of potatoes?! Another thing that seem to penalize my immediate family is the fact that we don't live down the block, or in the same house like the rest of them. But excuse me for not wanting to live in the exact city i grew up in, and for the record 15 minutes away hardly justifies as too far to visit!!! I know family members that live further away that are actually visited more than me and my little family! Sorry for venting, but i just think that this is ludacris that they believe it's all good to treat me this way. With my shitty ass health you would think that my own family would be willing, wanting to help me out with a break here and there. And i really do mean here and there, i'm not talking about every weekend or anything like that. Maybe once a month or something like that. Is that so hard? I partly feel as if i'm being treated this way and basically ostracized from my friends, or at least being able to go out baby free with them because of this. Has this happened to anybody else? We don't know many other people that are willing to watch our children, nor do we know who'd we would trust. Which i'm sure is something that all parents go through. Isn't family always supposed to be there? My friends little sister volunteered to watch the kids for us, the down side is.....she's not quite 13 yet. So that's out of the question until otherwise. I just want to be able to go out with my husband for a quiet dinner, or be able to spend a few hours at a local concert with my friends and relax! People believe that being a Stay at Home Mom doesn't do anything; therefore doesn't deserve a break. Are you kidding me?! I just hate this, and it's just plain stupid. So i guess what my family is saying " Yeah, go be a detachment parent. Bottle Feed. Go play. Throw in a crib regardless. We'll take care of the baby WHEN we WANT to." Some Family, huh?