Venting about FF vs BF

           I have nothing wrong with mothers that formula feed because they have to. I can't stand mothers that formula feed because it is convenient for them. For example; my SIL had her daughter at the exact hospital i had mine, but a year earlier. She was a young mom, and still is. She REFUSED to hear ANYTHING about BF, she had nothing medically holding her back. She decided to give her daughter formula so that she could go out and party, which she does almost daily. And what i have noticed in comparison of my daughters health and my nieces is greatly different. My daughter has NEVER been truly sick. Runny nose and coughs here and there but no need to be medicated. My niece on the other hand has had infection after infection, constantly on and off antibiotics. And the ONLY difference between our daughters is how they are/were fed. I've have seen first hand that FF babies get sicker more often, tend to weigh more (over weight) and be at risk of loads of other things. I just don't understand why a mother would chose something like that, when it is NOT A LAST RESORT?......for my SIL it's pure laziness. It might not be for everybody but that's what it is for her. She is a babysitter to her own daughter. Her daughter doesn't even call her mom because of how little she actually mothers the child. I mean for crying out loud this little girl has called ME MOM! Why? Because i actually act like a mother. That

    I get crap all the time for being a BF Mother, especially for being an EBF Mother. I hate how FF Mothers think that THEY are the ones that always get crap. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! You wouldn't believe the plethora of crap i get (okay, the other EBF moms would believe me i bet) for being an EBF Mom. Most recently was from the HOSPITAL, the hospital!! Basically telling me that there are no benefits or reason for me to be BF my 14 month old daughter past a year. Always getting on my case for NOT introducing Cows Milk to my daughter. Like MY MILK is going to suddenly do something detrimental to her since she is no longer a 'baby'?......come the hell on!! Here is a great website that breaks it all down about the Advantages of BF and EBF and then the Disadvantages of FF. I found another website that states Formula should be used as a LAST RESORT ONLY. I know that there are instances when a Mother can't feed her child as Science intended,and that is why formula is there. Medications and illnesses to the Mother like HIV/AIDS are a couple instances where the WHO feels using you own Breast milk is detrimental to the babies health. Remember, roughly only %2 of women CAN'T BF.

      I don't understand WHY  people give  their children FOURTH BEST at feedings. It completely boggles me. I hear again and again....." I couldn't BF, don't be little me!"....but is that really the case? And the classic "Food is food, there's nothing different to the baby if i FF vs BF." Are you serious? Your choice is your choice......i don't necessarily want to be one of those psychotic "Lactivist" but facts are facts. Why would you spend so much time, money and energy to purchase; make formula and clean bottles when the PERFECT FOOD is readily available with nothing for you to do, except lift up your shirt ;)!? My first child i BF for 7 mons, but had to stop because i was going back to work after graduation and couldn't afford a medela pump to pump my milk. But at least i tried and kept at it for 7 whole months. This time around i am EBF my 14 month old daughter, happily. Yes she eats table food; constantly, but i still BF her when she wants it. Yes she is in the bottom of the Stupid US Weight/Height Charts; 16 lbs 10.3 oz (7.549 kg) and 27in (68.58 cm). But she is perfectly healthy, who cares that she isn't 24 lbs (10.886217 kg) or 32in (81.28 cm), or whatever the AMERICAN FORMULA FEED Charts claim that she SHOULD be. According to the WHO MY daughter is perfectly fine in Weight AND Height. Tell me why the American Association of Pediatrics and the CDC says otherwise? According to them my child is SEVERELY UNDERWEIGHT and SHORT, in the bottom 2% for Height and Weight. Why is this? Because all the charts are based on FF babies......

     What does that do to BF and EBF families you ask? It makes them feel as if they are failing they're children because the doctors in whom we trust under mind us by saying WE ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH, LOOK! It's utterly ridiculous. So the next time that a FF mom tries to say that they are always under attack from BF moms, what about all the BF moms that are under far more attack from FF moms; doctors and other random people who think they know better. I know that both sides get beef about their own decisions, and YES they are just that DECISIONS. But remember this, decisions DO have CONSEQUENCES.

Risks of Formula Feeding For Infants and Children:

The effects of formula feeding on infants and children continue to be studied, and several significant risks have been identified. There is an increased risk of:

• Mortality – this applies in Western countries as well as developing countries. For example, according to Lucas and Cole (1990), if all the preterm babies in British neonatal units were fed breast milk rather than formula, 100 deaths a year from necrotising enterocolotis would be prevented.
• Asthma and allergy
• Acute respiratory disease
• Childhood cancers
• Nutrient deficiencies: e.g., fatty acids, essential for brain development, and amino acids, essential for central nervous system development, as well as calcium and iron, are not in the correct proportions and/or as easily absorbed from formula as breastmilk.
• Infection from contaminated formula
• Diabetes
• Chronic diseases
• Cardiovascular disease
• Gastrointestinal infections
• Otitis media – inflammation of the middle ear
• Urinary infections
• Sudden infant death syndrome
• Necrotising enterocolotis – an infection or inflammation that causes destruction of the bowel or part of the bowel.

as well as

• Reduced cognitive development

Disadvantages of Formula Feeding For the Mother:
If a mother feeds her baby formula rather than breastfeeding, this has an effect on her health too. There is an increased risk of:

• Breast cancer – the risk of breast cancer is decreased by 4 % for each year of breastfeeding, according to D Hollander in Breast cancer Risk is Reduced By 4 % for Each Year of Breastfeeding [International Family Planning Perspectives, Vol. 28, 2002].
• Being overweight
• Ovarian cancer and endometrial cancer
• Osteoporosis
• Reduced natural child spacing, putting more pressure on the woman’s body and causing general stress, particularly in developing countries where resources are scarce
• Rheumatoid arthritis
• Stress and anxiety
• Diabetes

Read more at Suite101: The Risks and Disadvantages of Formula Feeding: Facts About Breastmilk Substitutes Used in Bottle-Feeding Infants http://infant-toddler-health.suite101.com/article.cfm/the_risks_and_disadvantages_of_formula_feeding#ixzz0i05jsO1q

I just want to put all of that out there, so that Families are informed with the proper details about what FF and BF does. It is your choice. Nobody else's; just please make an informed decision for your children.

Arrrrgh, WTH?!

        I initially posted this the other day (3/9/10) on my Family Blog and decided to add it to this blog as well.

       In 2 weeks i have my Cardiac Catheter i've been trying to get everything with the kids and Donald situated in advance. Anywho, i called the nurse this morning asking if Isabella would be able to stay with me after post-op because of us still nursing and they said no. They tried to tell me to just pump and bf her that way. I tried to explain that i can't pump; and i never have been able to, and they were just basically too bad. That Donald will have to take care of her bc i will not be allowed, Plain as that. WHAT THE HELL!? I don't even know what to do right now. I've talked to LLLinc and they're told me hwo i need to talk to ect, and even the nurse at the hospital said to contact LLLinc and WIC. But really, what are they going to be able to do? This is ridiculous. I know that i'm being treated unfairly and mainly because she's not a teeny tiny infant and she is now technically a toddler they don't want to be bothered by it. But how difficult would it be for them to help me out?

          I go to WIC in a couple days to attempt to pump again for the up-teenth-billionth time! They said theyre going to hook me up with one that i can take home and see if i can pump enough for 2 day feedings and about 4 night feedings. Hopefully this will work. I've never used the Medela Brand pump before and it's supposed to be the best. I do hope i can get some out, at least that way Bella can just drink from the cup if she really wanted milk. I know it's not me, but it's all i can do. :(.....

         This really irks me though. I wonder if this one day is going to stop Isabella from EBF....part of me wouldn't mind that; but another part of me doesn't want that to happen yet. I know i need to worry more about my health and not what she wants. But i don't want to just deny her of me. It just seems wrong to me now. I have noticed more so with Isabella than with Skylair i have became an AP. And it doesn't bother me. It seems to bother other people at times; but eh, what does that matter, right? As long as me and my family are content with our AP who care what others have to say.

        I just don't understand why the hospital is so gung-ho about denying my request. It just seems wrong. I honestly don't think it has anything to do with a medicinal issue. It's all about Liability. And that is just plain sad.

        I hope to science (yes, i'm atheist. so what.) that i can actually get enough milk pumped out this week with the help from WIC. Bc Izzy needs her mommy milk. I've never ever had any luck with pumping before; it's been a total nightmare!!!! Maybe it has to do with my technique. Or maybe the brand of pump. I mean; how effective can an Even-flo; a formula company, breast pump really be? Not too effective in my experiences with my two children.......I've talked to Lactation Consultant after Lactation Consultant, and to no avail they say i should be able to pump. So; why can't i?.........

       Hopefully this surgery runs smoothly; i don't see why it wouldn't; and Isabella is fine and content during that time as well......because if she's not, how in the world do they expect me to make a full recovery. Anybody have any insight they'd like to enlighten me with?

So i read this and had to re-post

Fierce Mamas

An edited blog of women's stories on becoming & staying fierce. Submissions are always welcome! Fierce Mamas advocate for their children & themselves during pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding & parenting. Fierce Mamas make choices based on knowledge, intuition & informed choice- not fear.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Saving My Baby

I gave birth on a February afternoon by repeat caesarean. A pink, squalling bundle was handed to me, and I gazed lovingly into eyes that seemed to recognize me. I whispered sweet words of belonging to this girl child of mine, and comforted her outraged cries. She was the daughter I so desperately wanted.

A week after her birth, a friend dropped off a ring sling. I snuggled my 7 lb bundle into it and went about my way with a mostly content baby. Within two weeks, I was wearing her constantly. Towards afternoon, she’d begin to sob and scream inconsolably. She would arch and thrash, refuse to nurse, refuse a soother, the swing, my arms. The only thing that would quiet her screams was the sling.

Screamy baby began to lose weight. I carried her – day in, day out – in the sling. Repeated trips to the doctor revealed nothing. She was unable to nurse, screaming hysterically within moments of latch on.I was told rudely “ Do breast compressions. Breast is best.” Breast compressions made her choke and gag... and scream. I began feeding her formula. We went back to the doctor. Reflux. Milk Intolerance. Delayed gastric emptying. Her weight gain was poor, and the screaming increased in volume. Nights were long, filled with arching, thrashing baby. There was many a night that I slept with her in the sling, sitting up on the couch, unwilling to move her from her comfort zone. People told me I was spoiling her. I told them “ We’re coping. This is all that works.” I was told to let her cry it out, but I had no desire to abandon my child to a dark room to cry out her angst. My responsibility to her did not end when the sun went down. I whispered in her ear that I couldn’t stop her crying, but I could hold her while she cried.

I paced the floors with her, snuggled tummy to tummy in the sling. At six months, I begged the doctor to hospitilize her – I knew something was dreadfully wrong. The paediatrician agreed. She was poked, prodded, xrayed, and force fed. The screaming continued.

A day before discharge, my pediatrician’s partner waltzed into our room with his holier than thou attitude. He told me I wasn’t putting in the effort to feed her, to put her in another room to sleep and let her cry it out. I banned him from treating my child.

I worked part time, baby in sling. I got a mei tai, two more ring slings. I carried her everywhere. In the shower. To the doctor, to the park, on playdates. People nastily asked me how she would learn to walk if I never put her down. I ignored them. Carrying her stopped the screaming.

Just before her first birthday, she developed a high fever and cough. I took her to the ER, still wrapped in my sling. We waited 7 hours. Xrays revealed her heart was enlarged. We were admitted. I carried her nonstop for the next few days – through a terrifying whirlwind of echocardiograms and finally a diagnosis. During one particularly memorable screaming fit, a nurse turned to me in tears, and handed me my sling. My daughter quieted, safe in her sling.

She was in heart failure. A rare and very serious heart defect had been causing massive heart attacks. Fatality rates were 90% in the first year. The screaming was her suffering from crushing chest pain. In the hallway, the cardiologist turned to me and quietly told me that it was my parenting – the constant carrying – that had allowed her to survive against all odds.

My daughter never cried alone, left in a room. Had I ever practiced CIO, I would have woken to a lifeless baby. I held her through months of gut wrenching doubt, moments when I cried too. But today, I watch my daughter play and run, and laugh. I carried her through a mom’s worst nightmare... and we both survived.

Sarah Kaganovsky


Can you believe that?!  I am in absolute AWE!! I can't believe the audacity of those doctors, was it that to difficult to heed the MOTHERS advice and actually test the poor lil girl?! Thank Science this Mother knew something was wrong and did what she knew was right to help her baby girl!!! It reminds me so much of what it must have been like for my mother when they didn't believe her about me! I'm glad my mom never had to wait that long for somebody to believe her and treat me accordingly. But i could onl imagine the time she did have to wait felt like an eternity!

My Other "Sister"

 

This is my Other "Sister" Sarah!!! or Sarmi.....or Sarha.....lol

Don't we actually look like sisters?!  

(Today) 

This is the newest picture i have of one of my BFF Sarah and I! I haven't been able to go out and see her much lately between her working f/t and me well; being me, f/t SAHM.....

I absolutely LOVE my Sarah! She is the best everrrr. She is absolutely my Best Friend and Honestly she is a Sister to me....I mean for crying out loud she looks more like a sister to me than my REAL sister! LOL.....



We have been hanging out since she moved in across the street from me on Tronero Way back in '95, damn....it's been almost 15 years already?!...Crazay!!! We've had our spells where we've pissed eachother off; or lost touch, but we always end up reconciling :D!

Here's some Sarah Sarah With Lice and Te Tecia Mo Mecia whoop wop:

TOWELLL
Lotions
Prrrrka
Brrrrda
Nights
Myst/Riven/Exile
Choir
Altoids
You like it in the WAD?!
Hit Me Ticia ONE MORE TIME!
Tronero Way
Erics Red Hat
Singing
Geocities Websites

The list goes on and on.....lol.....but what else do you expect from 15 YEARS?!

I LOVE YOU SARMI!!!! (SARAH RICE-A-RONI)

I don't need....

......your snide remarks.
......your whispered spineless comments.
......your self absorbed self.
......to deal with your two sided ways.Basicaly,
......you.

Are you Fucking Kidding Me?!...........

So today i took the kids to King Skate for Laila's 8th birthday party. Anywho, Skylair has never been skating before, we were going to wait until he was 4 before we gave him quads to start out with because he's a little clumsy at times with say his bike and his scooter. Welp we had to try it out today, and he was doing pretty good, that is after i got the bearings fixed on his skate so that he wasn't going all crazy legs. Well Jamie took Isabella so that i could go around the rink with Sky, because HELLO there's no way i'd try and teach Sky to skate while holding Isabella and being on skates myself. Of course, Isabella cried; duh, she doesn't do well with people,period. Especially when she never sees the person holding her. And my SIL had to of course open her fucking mouth, AS ALWAYS; and talk shit. I am sooo fucking sick and tired of her!! "God, why is she out there skating with Sky, while Isabella is crying and ruining the fun?...." all behind my back by the way. So i said fairly loud to dustin, don't you just love how Steff is talking Shit?! And that's when she decided to get all cocky and finally say it to my face. She didn't apologize til Jamie talked to her. Honestly i think that was the only reason that she did. I told her afterwards not to worry about my SCREAMING CHILDREN ruining everything ever again; because we are not going to par take in any of their activities and bull shit. Maybe when i don't show up to the next festivity and her kids get upset about it she'll learn to keep her fucking mouth shut and quit being such a bitch. Jamie came and talked to me afterwards, and of course i was pissed off and needing to use my Inhaler......saying " oh you know her......don't take it to heart....blah blah blah", well i told him why should i act like the grown up when she's even OLDER than I AM!? I mean come the fuck on. I am sick and tired of her bull shit. You know what, fuck her and her weak ass apology. She tried to say that it didn't come out right and she didn't want me to take it the way that i took it. Well how the FUCK else am i supposed to take it?!........OMS i need a new family because mine fucking sucks.

Life Unexpected

Is by far one of the coolest new shows that the CW has come up with. I absolutely love it. Not to mention i'm lame and i can remember when all the Adult Stars in the show were starring in their first shows. LOL. Like the Mom was Liz on Roswell!! And the Step Dad so to speak was on Dawson's Creek. I really like the show, it's about a woman Cate and a guy Baze who are 32 yrs old and screwed around once in high school which led them to having a daughter that they gave up for adoption. When the daughter turned 17 she found out that they were her parents and showed up at their doors, no they're not together. And now it's about all of them adjusting to life as a Family with a Daughter, or actually having Parents. It's kind of funny and quirky and i like weird shows like this. And the title says it all 'Life Unexpected' and it's true....Life is by far Unexpected! You should watch it Mondays at 9pm on the CW!